The evening was hot and the breeze was not as the hashers pre-lubed from the cactus. Victor-Victoria gave his best effort to cool things down by bringing 2 additional Canuks to the hash...it did not work. After the hashers were well hydrated, they preceded to chalk talk where many hashers saw there life flash before their eyes due to a crazed Heffer barreling his vehicle through circle. After cleaning the mess (dropped by those in the direct path) off of the road Can't Cum on Saturdays performed an adequate/outstandin g chalk talk. I'm a Luuuger proved once again that he had the smallest shaft, was deemed hare and chose "Just" Liz to be his co-hare.

Luuuger apparently immediately regretted his decision and treating "Just" Liz like a rented mule sent her out to pasture with no intention of rescue. Luckily, Mountain Spread located Luuuger's discard and took her in as one of her own. Unfortunately the male hashers were stuck at a boob check for 10 minutes as the women were struggling to find trail or
apparently the strength to lift a small piece of cloth. Finally they came across it following a bacteria filled drainage ditch. After missing the free beer symbol under a troll bridge, all hashers were poked repeatedly by various objects in the desert of South Mountain. As dusk set, sewage ditch 2 was introduced, much to the delight of our dirtier hashers (by which I mean all of us). Upon resurfacing from the slime a wondrous thing was found to have happened. Victor-Victoria had slipped into Luuuger's back door and snared him. The first reunion of the initial hare/co-hare was very intense. Luuuger made up more excuses than Kobe Bryant to his wife after a trip to Colorado. He found no sympathy.

As the hash continued there was a strategically placed boob check by a playground and, of course, a trail on the side of another slippery drainage ditch. The mile run at a 45 degree side angle left all hashers with bone spurs, arthritis, and some with erectile dysfunction. Bush Yakker, with the nose of Toucan Sam, followed wonderful aroma of rotten, outdated, Chinese food (Redundant I know) that told him that he was on the right track. Of course, the reward for the good nose...still air, and hare.

The path took a new look from the dark ditches and slime to the friendly confines of the apartment complexes. After cumming upon the true trail quickly every time, the hash was making up ground on the hare. At the exact moment when the hashers were catching up, Bush Yakker decided to hump d' hole on the top of a wall hoping to make it too slippery for anyone to cross. It apparently took too long and actually made it very sticky and easy to climb. Poor Yakker was so spent that his ball fell out and was recovered by "Just" Rod in, of course, the ditch. After caressing the ball back to health "Just" Rod took off as the new hare.

Knowing the Wankers following would have a tough time recognizing true trail, the hare left his ID and money to ensure the validity of the trail. As the trail bent back toward the infamous hump d' wall the hare was harassed by Chief Clancy Wiggum and Rosco P. Coltrain. After (MULTIPLE!) sexual favors they let him go and told him to just keep the night stick because it would take too long to dislodge it. Using the night stick as a Tigger tail the hare was able to bounce over the wall (again) and start the death march back to the bar. The bar was full of hashers who did not have the pleasure of the night stick and went around the wall only to find Chief Wiggum and Roscoe waiting for them. Unfortunately for them the cops were no interested in women. Happy Birthday Fuck You!!! tried to push the issue, but they would have none
of it.

At on-in all was well with the exception of certain people flying out the door at the thought of interrogation and possible namings. The "wet and sticky" night was done and the world is safe again.

ON-ON,

"Just" Rod

"Next Hump" Info cuming on Monday! Thanks "Just" Rod for your first Hash
Trash! Good Job! - Luuuger