A Drinking Club With A Running Problem
 
Phoenix Hash House Harriers

Haring Guide – PH3

PH3 Wrong Way Haring Guide

Other local hashes may vary a bit – See LBH / Zonies / etc.

  1. The Start Location
  2. Chalk Talk
  3. ON-ON
  4. Hare Snare, On-In, On-After
  5. Hash Cash
  6. Food & Booze
  7. Contra Hashes

Congrats on being so drunk/stupid/comatose that you “volunteered” to hare a Wrong Way hash! Things hares need to think about…..

  1. The Start Location

Update the hareraiser/facebook with the following details by the Monday prior to the hash. Folks need to RSVP, so give them knowledge.

the start time

Location must be in a park (A bar or other awesome place, must be approved by MM)

special requirements (bring flashlights, money for bar stops, etc.),

any other information regarding the hash (special event, toga, birthday, etc…)

Shit to consider for the start:

Enough parking? (Parking should be available at the Start & End locations w/ room for plenty of cars.)

Drunken runner-friendly?

Lack of children, prudes, snobs, police, tweakers, angry old people w/ canes?

Access to cheap booze?

Spot for chalk talk? (you’re sketching it, after all!)

Nearby private-ish area for circle?

Beer permit if you are starting/ending in a park – We need to make sure we follow all local laws

Let the bar/homeowner/head zookeeper know we’re cumming so they can staff appropriately… or at least have the chance to say hell no! to us up front.

2.  Chalk Talk

The hares or their representative or RA should give a standard chalk talk before each run to explain the trail markings to the Virgins, if there is anything different from the norm be sure to let everyone know before you leave.

Write out a legible chalk talk & let the RA know what your weird little marks mean.

Let the pack know if they need to bring anything. (money, flashlights, etc…)

Let the pack know if there are any special trail markings.

Especially, tell them if trail is A-B or if cash/ID is needed on trail.

3.  The Trail (On-On)

Plan a trail with your Co-Hare.

Get chalk and flour ahead(!) of time. (Bring enough marking material for the trail!)

True trail should be around 4-6 miles. (True Trail)

Typical walking pace is about 3 to 5mph/running pace is about 6 to 9mph.

Typical on trail time is about 60-90 minutes.

Be creative.

Put a clear mark every 5 or so paces. It’d suck if we never actually found your trail.

Make sure the chalk mark is visible in low light.

Use white or yellow chalk. See California Creamin’ for white chalk

Be cruel to FRBs.

Don’t screw the walkers. If they spend their entire head(!) start trying to figure out where the hell trail starts, it defeats the point.

The best trails keep the pack together. Use your checks freely.

Don’t cross trail.

Remember that after a check, 3 marks = on!

Remember that after a whichy-way or CB, 1 mark = on!

Mark all turns and on-overs. Don’t confuse a clever trail for a poorly marked one.  A poorly marked trail will only cause anger in the pack- and they will certainly seek revenge. Plus the hare-raiser will end your life.

Avoid Private Property or get permission before leading 69-zillion hashers there.

(For a successful trail the Hare should pull up a detailed map of the area and run the trail before the hash, marking on the map their plans for checks, false trails & beer stops. This will allow the Hare to determine the length and duration of the hash. It will also let the Hare know how far the pack is behind (figuring a 10-12 minute lead). It may be a little more work but it is definitely worth it.)

4.  About Getting Caught (Hare Snare)

Well, you got caught, so what.  Consider yourself lucky, some other hashes have been known to take the hare’s clothes and make them finish the trail naked (seriously). Here you have a couple of choices:

if the Hasher who caught you took a shortcut and missed a beer stop or some trail feature, you could have them go back there and wait for the pack or,

by all means give that Hasher a piece of chalk and some flour and have them help finish the trail with you, possibly marking extra false trails, etc.

Whatever you do, do not give up on the trail! There are more Hashers following your markings further back.  If the trail stops in the middle of nowhere they are not going to be happy when you see them again, especially after they’ve wandered around aimlessly for an hour.

The End Location (On-In)

A quiet-ish, non-public area for circle.

The On-After 

Should be close to the End Location so drunken hashers do not need to drive, or can be easily transported. No hash cash or beer go towards the On-After. It is totally separate from the hash.

5.  Hash Cash

All collected money and attendance records must be handled by the Hash Cash.  If the Hash Cash is not in attendance, whoever fills in for that role is responsible for delivering the money and records to the Hash Cash.

No expenses will be reimbursed without receipts.  This is for standard items only: non-premium beverages, Brown Bags, beer permits and ice.

Any increase/decrease of the run “fee” from the normal amount must be pre-approved by mismanagement.  If the amount is increased, the hares are entitled to the amount of the increase multiplied by the number of paying hashers to pay for any extras provided by the hares.

(Example:  if the “fee” is increased from $5 to $7 and 20 paying hashers attend, then the hares can receive up to $40 for extras, which is the $2 increase times 20)

The hares are financially responsible for money spent on extras above this amount.

The normal amount of the run “fee” (in the example, $5 per paying hasher) will go to the Hash Cash to pay for normal Hash Expenses.

If the extra money is not spent, it should be returned to the Hash Cash.

Hares can be reimbursed up to $20 for a park permit.  Receipts must be provided.

Hares can be reimbursed up to $20 for Brown Bags.  Receipts must be provided.

Hares are FREE. Except for rego’d events, (Luau, RDR, etc) Hares still pay hash cash/rego cost.

6.  Food & Booze

All food and beverages during the hash are normally provided by the Foodmeister and Beermeister respectively.  Any changes from this must be pre-coordinated with the Hash Cash, Foodmeister, and Beermeister.

Coordinate the prelube & BN beer with the Beermeister. Let the Beermeister know a couple of days in advance so he/she can be prepared.

If a non-park start location is approved by MM, then MM may decide to buy pre-lube rounds if it is a bar. It is not a guarantee. It is a case-by-case basis.

Prelube will always be provided at a park.

The amount of BNs is a function of Trail Length and how hot it is. Typically there are 2 beer stops on a trail.

Beverages (water/beer) for prelube & BNs should normally be obtained from the Beermeister’s stash.  Any changes from this must be pre-coordinated with the Hash Cash and Beermeister.

In the event that the Hares provide beverages for the BNs they can be reimbursed no more than $25 for one BN or $40 for two or more BNs.

Any leftover beer must be returned to the Beermeister.

It is the Hares’ responsibility to alert the Foodmeisters of their On-In location so someone is on hand to provide munchies at the end of the trail.  Let the Foodmeister know a couple of days in advance so he/she can be prepared.

In the event that the hares provide the food and beverages, they should not spend more than the normal amount spent per run (food- $30, beverages/ice- $80).

Again, receipts must be provided to the Hash Cash for reimbursement.

If the BN is at a Bar, it is good etiquette for the Hares to buy the first couple pitchers.  Bar stops are not reimbursed by hash cash if you have not coordinated with the Hare Raiser/Hash Cash before hand.

*A word on bar stops.  It is preferred that the hares limit bar stops as much as possible.  Sure, bars are fun, but have you ever tried to get a group of hashers to leave a bar?  It ain’t easy.  It ends up making the trail take a really long time.

7.  Contra Hashes

Contra Runs are hosted independently by Phoenix area hashers on any day when a regular PH3 hash isn’t scheduled.  While the Phoenix H3 usually publicizes these runs, they are not PH3 runs.

They are “freelance” hashes that are organized entirely according to the whims of the hares.

As a contra hare, you are “hash dictator for a day”- how it’s put together is 100% your responsibility.

As long as you provide the start details to the PH3 hareraiser or GM or webgeek, contra runs are announced the same way regular PH3 hash events are, but since they are independent of the Phoenix Hash don’t expect the standard semi-reliable support from PH3 MM.

Keep in mind, in order for it to be considered a contra run, it has to be an actual hash.  In other words, you must run a trail and hold a circle at the end.

Don’t try to have a happy hour or throw a party and announce it as a contra run, that won’t fly.

Along with the details listed above, the contra hares are responsible for recruiting people to temporarily perform the duties of the Hash Cash/On-sec (to collect the contra cash and write down who showed up), beermeister, foodmeister, and GM/RA (to conduct the ceremonies in the circle).

After the event, the contra hares can get in contact with the GM, beermeister, or foodmeister to deal with any leftover supplies.

Save your receipts.  Remember, the hash does not subsidize contra hashes…but if you bought way too much beer and food, you can talk to mismanagement about selling leftovers to the hash so that stuff can be used for the next regular run.  Or, keep the leftovers and use them for another contra.

If you have leftovers (food/beer/cash) and feel generous, donate it to the hash to help fund our next event.  It makes sense- the same people who showed for your contra will be showing up anyway.  Why not contribute to the cause?…

THE END

Leave a Reply